On March 29, 2026, “No Kings” protests took place in the United States and parts of Western Europe, with thousands of people protesting President Trump’s foreign policy, particularly the rising tensions with Iran over the Strait of Hormuz. Organizers framed it as a movement for democracy, peace, and civil rights. Presumably, all these things were for someone. For street interviewer Lionel, known online as No Cap on God (@Nocapongod_), it was also an opportunity to ask some very simple questions. The replies that followed have been shared by everyone from regular Twitter users to Ted Cruz.
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Lionel’s initial bet was superficially absurd. Approaching one protester, he asked if it was “a little bit homophobic” that global attention was focused on the Strait of Hormuz rather than the homosexuals of Hormuz.The protester immediately agreed. completely. Without any hesitation.“Yes, I agree. Yes, definitely,” she said before launching into a thoughtful explanation of how “Historically, gays have always been very discriminated against, which is wrong on many levels. Even in war.”To be clear: Homosexuals of Hormuz do not exist. The Strait of Hormuz is a real and important waterway through which about 20% of the world’s oil supply passes. It has been at the center of US-Iran tensions for months. There are no gays in Hormuz. No injustice is being done to them. They are a pun.The protesters did not appear to be considering this possibility. Instead, he called for government reform and public education to deal with the imaginary crisis, with the same conviction one might bring to a real geopolitical issue.Lionel impressively kept a straight face the entire time. Whether the same can be said for the Strait of Hormuz is less certain.If the first protester set the tone, a self-described straight male ally raised the stakes considerably.Upon learning of the plight of the homosexuals of Hormuz, again, not anecdotal, he declared himself constitutionally and morally obliged to act.“I’m a straight man. I’m an ally, man,” he said with the seriousness of a man announcing his intention to run for office. “They are heading to the Strait of Hormuz but they are not willing to protect the gays of Hormuz. This is not good.”At some point during the interview, a small group began chanting: “Free the homosexuals of Hormuz! The homosexuals will refuse to leave themselves behind!”This mantra was apparently spontaneous. It was obviously honest. And no one involved apparently thought to ask where the homosexuals of Hormuz were actually located, what they needed to be liberated from, or whether they were consulted on the matter.The aide also offered, without prompting, that the area could “definitely turn into Fire Island”, a suggestion that reflects a level of urban planning optimism rarely seen in foreign policy discussions of the Middle East.
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Nockings: Free the Homosexuals of Hormuz
Iran is a feminist paradise, according to anti-war protest participants
Lionel then turned his attention to a man waving an Iranian flag and asked what he thought about America’s complicated relationship with Tehran.“I think America hates them because Iran is very feminist,” the man explained.“There’s no better place to be a woman than here in Iran,” a companion enthusiastically agreed, adding, “Here’s the United States, a country where women can drive, vote, appear in public without mandatory dress codes, and have legal recourse without the permission of a male guardian.”In contrast, Iran is currently one of the most restrictive countries on earth for women’s rights. The country has seen years of protests by Iranian women demanding basic freedoms, which are often brutally suppressed. The “Women, Life, Freedom” movement, which emerged after the death of Mahsa Amini in 2022, remains one of the most significant feminist rebellions of the modern era. It did not appear that any of this was information that the protesters had to face.The matter did not stop here.When Lionel asked about LGBT rights in Iran, a nearby protestor said that Ayatollah Khamenei was “very pro-LGBT” and there was even internal discussion about the next supreme leader being “a gay person”.For context: Homosexuality is illegal in Iran and punishable by death. The Islamic Republic has executed individuals for homosexual relations. To anyone’s knowledge, the Ayatollah has not expressed pro-LGBT sentiments. Nobody pushed back. Nobody checked the facts. Lionel simply moved on to the next question.
guillotine section (non-violent)
Perhaps the most structurally interesting part of the interview came when Lionel asked one particularly enthusiastic protester what he thought should happen to political opponents.The protestors had ideas.“Donald Trump will be the first,” he said. Stephen Miller in second place. However, the guillotine must be deliberately dulled before use, specifically so that the miller can “warm it up.” Ivanka Trump was mentioned. Eric Trump was mentioned. Melania Trump got partial, terms-unclear relief. The discussion over who would go in what order and with what blade specifications lasted a surprisingly long time, ending, without any irony, with the protester’s affirmation that he believed in nonviolence.When asked directly, he said, “Yes.”It is worth noting that calling for someone’s execution by guillotine and believing in nonviolence are, in most philosophical traditions, considered mutually exclusive positions. This demonstrator appears to have found a way to put the two together, which is either a remarkable feat of cognitive flexibility or a sign that the question was not fully processed.Lionel did not point this out. He thanked the man and moved ahead.
Venezuela, Cuba and China Fan Club
Elsewhere in the protests, a different set of conversations about the government’s preferred systems were unfolding, in particular, at an event taking place in a country that allows such conversations to take place freely in public.One protester said she admired China’s political system because its citizens receive healthcare, housing and education. When Lionel asked whether she would be willing to sacrifice some democracy for those gains, she responded by pointing to the arrests of activists as evidence that America was already not very democratic.Then she said in the same breath that she was a lesbian and would not date a capitalist. These two facts were only closely related, but together they painted a portrait of a man with very clearly defined values and a dating pool that appeared to be narrowing dramatically.Another protester defended Cuba and Venezuela, arguing that if socialism was destined to fail, the US should leave those countries alone to fail naturally. He noted without apparent self-awareness that he used to have a corporate job and had recently paid sixteen dollars for a salad at Sweetgreen. His proposed solution: The government should simply provide salads.This, depending on your economic politics, is either a radical reimagining of the welfare state or a very expensive way to think about lunch.
Venezuelan complexity
In a turn in which Lionel appeared to move with the ease of a man who has ceased to be surprised by anything, the protest also included a group of Venezuelan demonstrators who were there to protest against Maduro’s regime, a situation that put them directly at odds with the nearby Communist Party.“Those Venezuelans are traitors,” declared one protester, as real Venezuelans marched a few yards away to liberate their own country from the government this protester appeared to admire.The irony of calling people traitors for opposing an authoritarian government oppressing them, while participating in a protest to oppose authoritarianism, was not commented on by anyone present.Lionel stepped forward.
What does this really tell us?
It would be easy and obviously catchy to present this video as pure comedy. And it is, objectively, a lot of fun. The Gage of Hormuz chant alone is a piece of casual performance art that no satirist could have written.But there’s something really worth checking out underneath it all.These were not marginal figures. They were ordinary people who probably came with good intentions to protest something they felt strongly about. The problem is that “feeling strongly” and “knowing what you’re talking about” turned out to be very different things. The protesters, who could not locate the Strait of Hormuz on a map, were passionate about foreign policy. Protesters who believed Iran was a feminist utopia were marching for women’s rights. The protesters calling for the guillotine reaffirmed their belief in nonviolence.Isolation is not unique to one side of the political aisle. Interviewing people sitting in the street at any major protest of any ideological nature produces a certain percentage of people who are more committed to the energy of a movement than to its specifics. What made Lionel’s footage so shareable was the particular flavor of confident mistake on display, the complete absence of doubt, even when agreeing that torture was being done on an imaginary waterway.Ted Cruz shared the clip. Brit Hume called similar footage “priceless”. The right side had a field day.
Lionel and the Art of Saying Nothing
What makes No Cap on God’s interview style particularly effective, and particularly devastating, is what he doesn’t do.He doesn’t argue. That doesn’t heal. He does not smile perceptively or make editorial comments. He simply asks the next question with the same flat, serious delivery, creating a space in which people confidently fill the silence with what they believe to be true. It is, in its own way, a masterclass in letting a subject reveal itself fully on its own terms.The Gaze of Hormuz bit doesn’t work because Lionel set the trap, but because the trap wasn’t needed. He presented an absurdity, and his interviewers accepted it sincerely, elaborated on it, chanted about it, and pledged their allyship to it.Meanwhile, the Strait of Hormuz remains a real geopolitical flashpoint with real consequences for global oil supplies, regional stability, and the lives of real people, including LGBT individuals living under an Iranian government that many of these protesters have described as progressive.Homosexuals of Hormuz could not be reached for comment.They don’t exist.
