Living Together Tips: Do’s and Don’ts for Couples Living Together
Sharing a home is an exciting stage in a romantic relationship. You have the keys, but now what? While this is exciting, it is also an important step that should not be taken lightly. Sharing a roof means mixing habits, lifestyles and everything in between. Before you pack your boxes, here are some thighs you should get from day one.
Talk about finances quickly
Before you say ‘Oh, we’re not that couple. ‘Money is not a problem’, let’s stop you there. Money becomes the number one source of conflict when you live together. Even before you rent a place, or move into his or her house, start talking about money. How will you divide the expenses? Whether you go half-and-half, or split proportionately, open a joint account for expenses – it should all be clear.
discuss work
Nobody likes chores, but they happen. And it is important to take care of it. Cleaning, dishes, laundry, cooking – these all need to be discussed, unless you want to be the one cleaning the bathroom every day. Create a schedule based on availability, strengths and weaknesses.
respect each other’s personal space
Yes, you are living together because you want to spend ‘more’ time together, not ‘all’ the time. So set a boundary on personal space. Talk about this. Maybe it’s spending Friday evenings in the reading room, or dancing with your friends on Saturday nights. It is important to protect your individuality at all costs. Discuss this with your partner.
set house rules
Believe it or not, you need household rules. These will save your time and peace. Talk about having guests, whether overnight visitors are allowed. You don’t want to find his friends lying on the couch and trashing your house after three weekly match days. It’s important to discuss these things, because these little things add up quickly. Think of it less as a rule book and more as healthy limits for the well-being of both of you.
keep communication open
When you’re hanging out together, it’s important to keep communication open. Make a habit of checking regularly, not just when something goes wrong. Talk about concerns before they become big issues. Be open and honest with each other.
Don’t jump into it just because it’s convenient
Why are you going in? Now that’s a question you have to answer for yourself. Are you moving forward because you really want to make your relationship work or because it solves a logical problem? It might help to split the fare, cut down on commuting costs, but it shouldn’t be your reason.
don’t avoid talking about money
Most couples avoid talking about money, and this gets them into deep trouble. Your financial arrangements are what provide you peace while having sex. Therefore, it is also important to revise your financial agreements as you move forward.
Don’t skip setting limits
Most people think that boundaries are walls, but they are not. This is the foundation of a healthy relationship. Always set proper boundaries. For example, alone time or self-care on Sundays, time with family, or privacy with your phone. These small boundaries are what will bring you together.
Don’t ignore initial irritations
Now when you live together, both of you will have different lifestyles. It is important to address minor differences as quickly as possible. For example, if you keep avoiding your partner’s habit of bringing bathroom slippers into the living room, one day it will turn into a much more serious situation. Just tell them it bothers you.
Don’t expect perfection in a week
You won’t feel ‘at home’ for the first week or two. It will take time to adjust to the new place. You are getting to know your partner’s habits, and seeing if they suit yours. So don’t jump to conclusions in the first week. Give it some time, as it takes time to settle.